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This is quite possibly the most beautiful part of your entire wedding day… okay, you’ll probably look pretty amazing too… but when it comes to a pure and sentimental confession of love and solemn vow-making, you really can’t beat it! Ceremony Script Writing. Some prefer their ceremony to be short and simple whereas others opt for a longer sermon complete with readings, prayers and unity ceremonies. Bottom Line, the length doesn’t matter so long as it is yours. Your ceremony should say what YOU both would actually say to each other and it should reflect your personalities and your love for each other.

How to Write Ceremony Scripts

Depending on your Priest, Pastor, Officiant, or whoever is marrying you, you may be provided a script where you just fill in your vows. These scripts are traditionally beautiful already and a wonderful tribute to your religion. If you are planning a non-secular ceremony where Uncle Bob is marrying you from his powers invested in him by the Internet, you may need to write the words yourself. Let’s talk about a few basic elements of a ceremony that DO need to be included and then you get to fill in the rest! I’ll build you sort of a standard outline and then you can elaborate all the personal ‘pretty’ parts.
 

{FYI} Ceremony Script Writing is actually a GEG Add-On if you would like to have a meeting and compose some prose together! Each ceremony must include these few basic things:

  1. Opening Statement/Welcome
  2. Expressions of Intent
  3. Vows
  4. Rings
  5. Pronouncement
  6. The Kiss
Opening Statements: When you make it to the end of the aisle with your escort, you will all be standing there awaiting the ceremonious “giving away” of the bride. Something will need to be said. Here is what you may recognize, “Who gives this woman to be married to this man?” Or many other interpretations of this exchange.

Assignment 1 | Giving Away

Decide how this little {not so little at all} piece of your ceremony shakes down. Will your groom to be, come down and shake dad’s hand then escort you up to the aisle? Will dad say, “Her mother and I? Will your entire family stand up and recite, “We do” or will you just give a kiss, a hug and walk yourself up there quietly? Can’t decide or can’t picture it yet without all the moving parts {loved ones}? That’s TOTALLY okay! Often this little piece is ironed out at the rehearsal. You don’t actually want to micromanage this one…. Have an idea, but let dad or whomever, give-you-away the way they have always dreamed about or how they think this heavy, emotional part for them should play out.
 
Oka, you made it! You’re up at the altar, MOH has your bouquet and you’re hand in hand with your future spouse…. There will be FIRST words. Whatever it is that pops out of your Officiant’s mouth will be them… You may recognize this:
 
Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today…
 
From here you can go into any story, prayer or, ‘how they first met’ anecdote read aloud from one of your best friends. The ceremony is officially ‘open’ now and let the love fly!
 
 
Expression of Intent: This part comes next and it truly is important…. Why? This is actually what people are ‘witnessing’ for a lack of better words. You have to say out loud that you are willingly and knowingly entering into this marriage. I know, I know, seems silly right, well back in the day brides didn’t enter into marriages willingly… I am proceeding in CAPS so you know I’m serious… THIS IS THE ONLY PART OF YOUR CEREMONY THAT IS LEGALLY MANDATED. You must ACKNOWLEDGE that you are taking this person as your legally wedded partner for the rest of your life… its sort of a {really} big deal.
 

What you may recognize from The Common Book of Prayer

Will you have this man to be your husband; to live together in the covenant of marriage? Will you love him, comfort him, honor and keep him, in sickness and in health; and, forsaking all others, be faithful to him as long as you both shall live?
 
OR
 
Do you take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold from this day forward for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish until death do you part?
 
Sounds like vows right? And to some these totally are enough. But technically these are your Expression of intent. You can absolutely have your own vows come later, or leave it here. These pretty much sum it all up! However, they’re standard, and not yet completely personal. Do, however feel free to write your Expression however you want so long as in there somewhere it
is written like a question that you then AGREE to publically so they can witness it.
 
Little Hint: When you’re standing up there all goo-goo eyed at your spouse and don’t remember what to say… It is based on how the question is asked, “Will you?” Answer is “I will.” If the Officiant asks “Do you” then you will answer, “I Do.” If you want those ever so famous I Do’s in there you best write your Expression of Intent correctly 😉
 
Vows: The great news is that for the sake of smooth… your vows that you write can come in right now, immediately following the Expression of Intent.
Often then Officiant will transition with something like:
 
The couple has prepared their own vows to read…
 
Ladies typically go first but it isn’t a hard fast rule.
 
Unity Ceremony: After you have both exchanged vows you then can perform any number of amazing unity ceremonies which symbolize and make “tangible” the vows you have just said; an ‘in remembrance of this day and the words spoken here” totem of sorts to display in your home. You’ll probably stare at it every day that first year of marriage… especially when you’re fed up with picking up socks! Make it a good one and marriage takes work 😉 However, these ceremonies are totally optional.
 
Rings: Also optional but widely accepted and used is the exchanging of rings. These rings have a lot of fun history behind them including a few archaic symbolisms. It is widely believed that the first examples of wedding rings were found in ancient EgyptRelics dating back as far as 3,000 years ago, including papyrus scrolls, show evidence of braided rings  of hemp or reeds being exchanged among a wedded couple. Egypt viewed the circle as a symbol of eternity, and the ring served to signify the never-ending love between the couple. This was also the origin of the practice of wearing the wedding ring on the ring finger of the left hand, which the Egyptians believed to house a special vein that was connected directly to the heart. [Source]
Historically, the wedding ring was connected to the exchange of valuables at the moment of the wedding rather than a symbol of eternal love and devotion, a sign of “earnest money”. According to the 1549 edition of the Book of Common Prayer: after the words ‘with this ring I thee wed’ follow the words ‘This gold and silver I give thee’, at which point the groom was supposed to hand a leather purse filled with gold and silver coins to the bride. It is a relic of the times when marriage was a contract between families, not individual lovers. Both families were then eager to ensure the economic safety of the young couple. [Source] No matter what the rings mean to you, if you have them you need to work them into the ceremony. You can have your Officiant explain some of the beautiful history [See the Egyptians] or make up your own meanings to explain what they mean to
you.
 
Pronouncement:
Once those rings are on, you’re officially wed! Hooray! The Officiant will say something to the effect of,
 
Ladies and Gentlemen, for the first time… 

Assignment 2 | Wording

How would you like to be pronounced? Mr. & Mrs. Smith? Mr. & Mrs. John Smith? Jane & John Smith? Decide, and write those words exactly into your script so that the Officiant can practice and doesn’t slip up!
 
After the Pronouncement you’ll hear the words, “You may kiss the bride!” And your heart will flutter beyond control. That will be your wedding! Now, go write it!
 
If you are not a GEG couple I have an awesome worksheet available to you for download on Etsy! Check out Ceremony Structure and Music HERE
 

Assignment 3 |Basic Outline

You have already set me your Processional Orders,{ THANK YOU} so you know who is escorting you. I would like for you to send me the 6 piece outline of your script. Think Drama Class way back in high school…
 
Officiant: “yaddah, yaddah, eloquent words, beautiful things about you both” {handing bride’s hand to groom} Bride’s Father: “Love you, love you, WE do… love you”
 
Write the speaker followed by a colon [:] Write actions inside brackets {paying close attention}
 
 Write out the tentative, 1st Draft scripting for….
1. Giving Away the bride
2. Welcome words
3. Expression of Intent
4. Vows (tell me if you’re writing your own or not) I DO NOT need the final vows written yet! Lots of time still!
5. Unity Ceremony (If you’re doing one)
6. Pronouncement exact wording
 
We will fill in all the pretty and elaborate over the next few weeks, but YES, it is time to start writing! You’ll want time for it to sink in, change and evolve as you learn new things about each other. This is just a rough draft, but it is important to have, even if it sits in a drawer for the next few months. It’s there, and you can easily edit it whenever you’re feeling inspired or of course… in love!

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